I guess I would just have to live with it, I thought.I put my shorts and t-shirt back on and left.We arrived at the beach and as expected on any Satur...ay it was packed.AJ circled the parking lot and was lucky enough to find us a descentparking spot. We unpacked and found a bench with a grill not too farfrom sands. I grabbed the sunscreen and protected the kids. I was notgoing to wear any at first and try to get a tan. AJ had warned me on thedrive over here that my body could only take about 15. I had real hope for us until he decided to stay for two years. I had to free myself." She sniffled. "I read about those wives of old sea captains who had to wait it out for long months alone. I felt bad about leaving him, but I guess I just don't have the right stuff to live there. I hated it when Daniel left me alone all the time and I still loved him." How are you feeling about Rachel's living here and working out our family problems?"She rolled over and put both arms around me with her hard. "Lets get you cleaned up and into something else," he said.I was actually surprised at his kindness until I watched him walk out ofthe room.'Well that figures, stole my body and still doesn't trust me, what adouchebag... Ugh, I mean bitch, she's such a bitch,' I thought still atwar with my own mind.I wiggled my toes, still clad in the leggings and realized that for oncethe clothes didn't actually feel that bad compared to earlier. I almostwondered what I was so bothered with before I rebounded. It was actually about eight or nine months from when I purged everyfeminine piece of clothing I owned, telling myself this was all wrong,but the desires just had become stronger. That part I knew.Back to walks enfemme and I moved to a new neighborhood that made iteasier to go out dressed. That was not the purpose of my move, but ithelped things click and I was closer to some of the people in my supportsystem. I now lived in a more mixed area (gay and straight) and got alittle more into clubbing.
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